New research shows that forgiving people can help you get a better night of sleep. And, it turns out that forgiving yourself has even more sleep benefits.
*NOTE* Forgiveness doesn’t mean you have to reconcile with the person you are forgiving.
10 Steps to Forgiving Yourself
- Know exactly how you feel about what happened and be able to identify what about the situation is not OK. Then, say it out loud to yourself or a trusted friend.
- Make a commitment to yourself to feel better. Forgiveness is for you and no one else.
- Forgiveness does not mean condoning the action. In forgiveness you are seeking peace and understanding that come from grace and compassion. We are all human and we all make mistakes.
- Get the right perspective on what is happening. Recognize that your primary distress is coming from the hurt feelings, thoughts, and physical upset you are suffering now. There is a disconnect between what you want and what actually is.
- At the moment you feel upset, practice stress management to soothe your body’s fight or flight response. (If you are not sure what stress management tools are find out more through Mind-Body Medicine classes.)
- Accept that you are in control of your personal decisions and choices, but some things are out of your control. Remind yourself that you can hope for and work towards health, love, friendship, and prosperity, but you will cause internal strife when you require perfection.
- Try Plan B. Or C. Put your energy into looking for another way to meet your goals rather than through the previous experience.
- Focus on what you have learned from the experience and look for the love, beauty, and kindness around you. Put more energy into appreciating what you have done right.
- Notice when you are being critical of yourself and evaluate whether your inner voice is telling a truth or a lie. Confront the lies with truth.
- Talk to yourself like you would talk to your best friend. Your body and mind will always be with you. Offer it kindness and compassion.
Do any of these ideas seem like they might help you forgive yourself or help you sleep better tonight?
Find out more about Mind-Body Medicine Classes.